I love this one…

Two fish are in a tank.

One says to the other “I’ll man the guns, you drive”

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh

My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli.

He was pulled in by a strong currant.

Nerd joke alert…

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.

One says, “I’ve lost my electron.”

The other says, “Are you sure?”

The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive…”

A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Glad Wrap shorts.

The shrink says, “Well, I can clearly see you’re nuts.”

Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly “I was artificially inseminated this morning.”

“I don’t believe you,” said Dolly.

“It’s true, no bull!”

“Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The green, green grass of home’.
“That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.”
“Is it common?”
“It’s not unusual.”

Man with a strawberry stuck up his bum goes to the doc.
Doc says “I’ll give you some cream to put on it.”

Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?”

Two aerials meet on a roof, fall in love get married.
The ceremony wasn’t much but the reception was brilliant.