Entries Tagged 'Funny' ↓

I have two cats, so they are friends! One is medium to large, the other is compact, but they are similar ratios.

I am fairly sure their hobbies are lounging around and bird watching. The big one is not very good at the ‘I’m not paying attention to you’ game, but the little one is. Corporal cuddling only seems to results in drawing blood.

I LOLed when I saw this at the end of today’s DJ Kitteh video on Ican has cheezburger.

Quick…break glass in case of emergency…

I was pointed in the direction of 27b/6 by the boss (the one from home, not work) and the very first post I read cracked me up. Then I read a few more and I was in hysterics. There are quite a few to get through, so this should keep me going for a few weeks. Let me know which is your favorite.

I love this one…

Two fish are in a tank.

One says to the other “I’ll man the guns, you drive”

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A fsh

My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli.

He was pulled in by a strong currant.

I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn’t reach the meat off the top shelf.

He said, “No, the steaks are too high.”

A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, “My dog’s cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him? ”

“Well,” says the vet, “let’s have a look at him”

So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.

Finally, he says “I’m going to have to put him down.”

“What? Because he’s cross-eyed?”

“No, because he’s really heavy”

A Definition…

Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bullsh#t before

Nerd joke alert…

Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.

One says, “I’ve lost my electron.”

The other says, “Are you sure?”

The first replies, “Yes, I’m positive…”